literally just want to cry forever.

god worst fucking karma ever!!! i need to change my lifestyle. need to change. it's a sign i'm too ungrateful and everything is so materialistic. no more wanting. here i go.

FIN.

keeping calm and carrying on.

fuck you.

things that i want to say and should have but haven't at that moment only because i was incapable and shocked and distraught and i still can't even figure out how to word it except by saying FUCK YOU. what the hell was i DOING??? am i stupid??? why did i even bother...i wasted my time especially for you to say things like that that you probably didn't even realize the way you meant it. don't expect to call me or talk to me when you 'need' it. so rude. so upsettingly rude. i'm terribly hurt but fuck it, it doesn't matter. i shouldn't care and even though i say i don't, i clearly do. and even though you say you don't you clearly do. i'm going to continue living my life the way i did that one month. minding my own business and not even bothering, it's what you wanted. this is going to stop and i thank you for it.

a cigarette waiting to happen.